Attempting to Balance Life With Kids
“Children seldom misquote. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn’t have said.
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Let me start off this post with the following statement - I am convinced that parents love their grand-kids more than their own kids. Let me give you a couple of examples to prove it.
Example number 1: I make a quick stop at my parents’ house after the gym and as soon as I walk in the house, the first question they ask me is, “Where’s Zoe and Zaria?” Not “How are you?” Or “Where are you coming from?” The look of disappointment on their faces at the fact that I was alone, was so apparent.
Example number 2: My mom calls me on MY BIRTHDAY and gets my voicemail. She proceeds to leave me the following message - “Hi Martha, it’s your mom. I was just calling to find out how Zoe and Zaria are doing today. Okay bye!”
If you don’t have kids yet, enjoy your parents love and affection because once you do, you might as well just be a surrogate that carried their grandkids or a sperm donor LOL.
Kids are such a blessing. I can honestly say, I now have a slight idea into how much God truly loves us by being a parent – the unconditional, sacrificial love. The kind of love that is faithful, patient and boundless. When you have kids, you get to experience that kind of love and then it hits you that that is the kind of love that God has for you. It’s mind-blowing!
Kevin and I have been together for 11 years (where did the time go?) and we’ve gone through some challenges, but nothing would have prepared us for parenthood - not just to one baby but two! My previous manager always used to tell me, “Trust me, your relationship has not been challenged yet. Wait until you have kids!” He was right, in so many ways. Sleeping with a baby on your chest every night because they have really bad reflux, running on 2 hours of sleep and worrying about work, can really take a toll on you. Before you know it, you are snapping at each other about the smallest things because you are both just exhausted. The first couple of months of the girls being home from the hospital was extremely challenging for us.
We needed help and a lot of it. We decided to have myself and the girls stay with my parents for 4 days out of the week and we’d come back home for 3 days. Going back and forth weekly was turning out to be exhausting too. A few months later, we got an in-house nanny and that was a huge help! Our nanny left us last year to go back to her home country and that was a bummer. Since the girls are older now, we have them in daycare and then along came covid-29 lol.
Balancing every other aspect of your life when you have small babies is hard but as they get a bit older and get on a schedule, you can plan other things around them. During our pre-marital counselling, Pastor Henri stressed the importance of consistently having date night at least once a month. It doesn’t always mean going out and spending money but just setting aside some quality time with your spouse that doesn’t involve the kids. We are still figuring out this whole parenting thing, one day at a time. It’s imperative for Kevin and I to have ‘me’ time separate from each other but to also ‘we’ time separate from the kids. So far, we are getting a kick out of watching 90 Day Fiance every Sunday night 😊.
What are some of the things that you guys are doing to balance life with the kids?
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